So...

January 2010 is on record as one of the suckiest months ever. The LT, who will now be called the EX, decided his post-traumatic stress disorder was getting to be too much for him, he couldn't "deal with the reality of his home situation" and was "on a self-destructive path", and left me and the girls, who will now be called their names of Claire and Natalie. The EX strung me along for a couple of weeks, finally asking for a divorce on January 18th. Now, I DO NOT BELIEVE IN DIVORCE, so I said no. But as is his wont, he got his way when he confessed to an affair at work, changed the locks to the house, and cancelled my bank account and credit card.
I really, really don't recognize this person anymore. I get just sick when I receive texts or phone calls from him. I went on a stress-induced Diet Coke starvation diet and lost nearly all my Natalie pregnancy weight, which one might think is a good thing until you remember that I'm still breastfeeding. So now I'm also supplementing with formula. My appetite has pretty much improved now, thanks to the fact that the girls and I moved in with my parents, youngest brother, and 4 1/2 year old sister. My mom is a great cook and while I am, too, I know I wouldn't have any interest in cooking for myself, a 3-year-old and a 9-month-old.
I also have to get a job. Even though the EX says he'll willingly pay child support, I will still need more money than that. I don't want to live with my parents forever (I am almost 31 years old). Plus, I will need to get out and meet people. My mom will be doing daycare for the girls, at least to start out. That will help transition them into not having me around 24/7.
Ugh. I can only hope and pray that the rest of 2010 goes better than the first two months.

Baby Jesus and Mama Mary and Daddy Joe-pep

Which is how Cee describes any manger scene she sees. Which is pretty cool. Which also reminds me that once in awhile, I do something right as a Mommy.
When I got out the Christmas decorations this year, Cee saw the wrapping paper and thought it was for a birthday. So I told her, yes, it is, and explained about Baby Jesus, Mama Mary, and Daddy Joe-pep.
We made a birthday cake for Baby Jesus this year. The LT and I are trying to make sure the girls know about Jesus at Christmas before putting too much emphasis on Santa. Also, I had to use up some bananas, so it was a banana cake we made, and then I found some chocolate frosting in my ingredients cupboard and dumped a lot of sprinkles on top. I think Jesus would be pretty pleased by His cake.
I did have to explain to Cee that Jesus would not be coming by for dinner on Christmas Eve, but that we would think of Him when we ate it and remember His birth.
The girls had a very nice Christmas. Their big gift was a toy kitchen and Cee and Lee both loved it. Then there were some little gifts and each got a blanket. Cee's featured Lightning McQueen and Mater, and Lee's had her name and a little puppy embroidered on it.
So Merry Christmas to you all, and Happy Birthday to Baby Jesus.

I have too many books!

Well, too many books for the available space in my house. I have all the books I've collected since early childhood, with the exception of picture books, which are still at my mom and dad's house, waiting patiently to be read by the grandchildren who are arriving in droves. Plus, since I am an avid bookworm and prefer to own my books than return them to the library, I have continued to acquire more and more books in my adult life.
I also really like rereading my books which is a trait not everyone understands. This is another reason why I prefer to buy books. Many of my childhood books, particularly the Little House on the Prairie books and Betsy-Tacy books, are in atrocious condition because I am not kind to my books. They get carted everywhere, bent up, torn. They're like the blanket a little kid carries around until it's just a rag. But it's a much loved rag.
I did some straightening of the game closet tonight. This is also the closet that houses the vast majority of my books. I say "my" books because I've contributed most of the books in our household library collection. Many of my books beloved in my teens, like Nancy Drew and Babysitters Club, are contained in boxes because there's not room on the shelves.
I'm probably crazy for keeping these hundreds and hundreds of books. If there's ever a fire, I'd be heartbroken at the loss of my collection. But they are part of who I am. As dippy as it sounds, my books are kind of like old friends that I still visit from time to time.
Someday I'll have enough space for all of them to be out, too, I hope.

Back yet again

I know, I know, it's been MONTHS since I've posted. Well, the LT and I had our baby on Mother's Day. I'll call her Lee. She's 3 months old now and she and Cee are so cute. She's a far more mellow baby than Cee was, and a better sleeper too. Just don't make her wait for nursing. And don't delay her bedtime. That's really the only time she gets fussy. It's been crazy going from a family of 3 to a family of 4, but we're pretty much adjusted, at least for now.
We've moved Luna outside. We found a doghouse on Craigslist, and she seems to be pretty happy. Samwise, Freya, and Molly also now spend most of their time outside. It's easier with Cee and Lee to not have the dogs constantly nuts in the house. We leave the dogs outside now when we are gone overnight and have the neighbors come over to feed them and make sure everything's okay, and that's working out really well. We're not quite sure what we're going to do this winter, but we'll figure it out.
The LT's family and all of us took a trip up the North Shore last week. It was Cee's first time up the Shore, and she had a blast throwing rocks into Lake Superior. She's still talking about it. We were all ready to come home, though. A vacation with 8 adults and 6 kids ages 2 months to 16 years gets really crazy.
Hopefully I'll find time to post more often now. My mother blogs more than I do.

So far, so good

Cee has slept straight through the night for 2 nights in a row. I don't believe this has happened before. Last night she fell asleep around 8:30 and slept until 7:30, and the night before we did the crying thing as I laid her down at about 8:40, but she only cried for about 20 minutes and again, slept until about 7:00. So hopefully, this is a pattern that we can follow for, oh, the next 16 or so years.
And I guess just because you quote the Bible for your Facebook status, it makes all your friends worry about you. Grr. But that's a post for another time. Right now Cee is freaking out about her princess gloves and needing help with them.